What to Expect in an EMDR Session
If you’re here, you might be feeling curious about EMDR, but also a little nervous about what actually happens in a session.
You’re not alone. So many of my clients tell me:
“I don’t really know what EMDR is.”
“I’m afraid I’ll have to relive everything.”
“Is it like hypnosis?”
“Is this even going to work for me.”
It can feel vulnerable to consider something new, especially if you’ve spent years holding it all together. My hope is that this post will help you feel more informed and safe enough to explore whether EMDR could be right for you.
EMDR Is Not Just Talking About Your Trauma Over and Over
Unlike traditional talk therapy, EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is designed to help you process the memories, beliefs, and emotions that you may have suppressed, distracted, numbed, or avoided.
It’s not about reliving your worst moments. It’s about giving your brain and body what they need to finally digest what happened, so it doesn’t hold so much power over you.
What an EMDR Session Looks Like
Here’s what you can expect when you work with me:
1. Checking In & Preparation
We always start by grounding. We’ll talk about what’s been coming up for you, check your window of tolerance, and practice the calming or resourcing strategies you need to feel safe.
2. Identifying a Target
Together, we’ll choose what you want to work on. This might be a memory, an image, a body sensation, or a negative belief about yourself (like “I’m not safe” or “I’m not good enough”).
3. Setting Up the Target
We’ll look at:
The picture or memory that represents it
The negative belief you hold
How it feels in your body
The emotions attached to it
This helps us get a clear map before we start processing.
4. Bilateral Stimulation (the “EM” in EMDR)
In EMDR, we use something called bilateral stimulation to help your brain process what’s been stuck. In online sessions, this can look like:
Watching a moving dot or bar on your screen
Listening to alternating audio tones
Guided tapping you do yourself (like tapping your shoulders or knees)
You’ll stay fully awake and in control the whole time. This isn’t hypnosis (you stay fully awake and in control), it’s simply a way to help both sides of your brain work together to process the memory safely.
5. Processing
As we do sets of stimulation, you share what’s coming up. Thoughts, feelings, memories, body sensations.
You don’t have to tell me every detail. There’s no right or wrong way. My role is to help you notice, stay with it safely, and let your brain do what it knows how to do:
heal.
6. Installation & Body Scan
We help you strengthen new, more adaptive beliefs (“I am safe now,” “I’m good enough” “I am loveable”) and check your body for any remaining distress.
7. Closing & Grounding
We always end by returning you to a calm state. You leave session feeling as grounded and safe as possible.
Will I Lose Control or Be Forced to Relive Trauma?
This is one of the biggest fears people share. EMDR isn’t about re-traumatizing you.
You stay in control.
You can stop at any time.
You don’t have to share anything you don’t want to.
My job is to help you feel safe enough to allow what’s been stuck to move.
Why Clients Choose EMDR
So many people come to me because they’ve already tried talking it through.
They know their story inside out.
They can analyze their patterns.
But they still feel stuck.
EMDR is different because it helps you process what words alone can’t touch.
Ready to Learn More?
If you’re curious about what EMDR could look like for you, I’d love to talk with you. You can find my Contact page at the top of this site to get in touch.
